Sending sexual messages and pictures is very common nowadays. For some people, it’s just part of exploring their sexuality or part of flirting with a boyfriend, girlfriend or friend. All good fun, right? It is if you want to do it, don’t feel pressured, and don’t get bombarded with unwanted images.
And it's not new! There's a lot of nudity in ancient art, and these often don’t look so different from modern day porn or selfies – the poses, the over-exaggerated body parts. People throughout history have made and shared sexual images, it just got easier to share them when digital photography and the internet was invented!
Find out more about sending nude images and how to keep yourself safe in the drop downs below:
Only send them if YOU want to
No one should pressure you to send nude pictures. If you are even slightly uncomfortable with this, say no - it is your right to do so, and anyone who cares about you should respect this.
Remember, once you share an image it can be extremely difficult - very often impossible - to control where it ends up. Always keep this in mind and make sure you are 100% comfortable before sharing.
If you’re feeling pressured to send selfies, the Childline Zipit App is a useful tool to have on your phone.
Remember, not everything you see online is real
Meeting people, sharing chat, ideas and images on social media is mostly great and can give you the freedom to be who you want to be.
But it can be limiting too – and often people are pressured to fit a certain standard. Even if you’ve never watched porn, you’ll have seen ‘pornified’ images on social media - poses people do on their profiles and the type of images people send or request from each other in nude selfies. These are all originally from pornography. Often we can feel pressure to be expected to look a particular way and feel a lot of judgement when we don’t fit that expectation.
As well as this, even though people can often feel judged for not having sex or not wanting to send nude images, they can also feel judgement when they do: this can sometimes be referred to as ‘slut shaming’. This treatment is unfair, and no one has the right to judge or criticise anyone else for their sexual activity.
Other things to consider before you send
- It is important to remember that it is your choice. You should never be pressured into doing or sending something you don’t want to.
- If you are with someone who puts pressure on you to send sexual messages, but you don’t want to, you could be in an abusive relationship. If you’re worried or want to find out more, visit our page on Healthy Relationships.
- If you are in a relationship with the person you are messaging, and you break up, can you be sure that they won’t send your images to their friends or post them publicly online?
- Would you be happy for all of your class, or your partner’s friends, to see what you’re about to send?
- Are you identifiable in your photos? It is safer to send images that don’t show your face or any birthmarks/identifiable features.
- Is the phone being used by the person you’re sexting 100% secure at all times or is there a chance that someone else might unlock their phone and find your messages?
- If you meet someone online and decide to start sending them nude selfies, are you absolutely sure they are who they say they are? It’s easy to pretend to be someone you are not online
- Could you be putting yourself at risk of blackmail or bullying? If someone has private images of you or messages from you, they could use them against you in the worst possible ways
- You could also be vulnerable to attracting unwanted attention ; sex offenders, for example, are often experts when it comes to finding these images and distributing them
- Are you breaking the law? Sexting can feel harmless but receiving or sending indecent pictures of a person under 18 is illegal, even if they were taken with their permission
If someone leaks a nude image of you, it is a crime
It is never okay to share a private image or video of someone else without their consent.
Sometimes, individuals will do this in order to cause the person in the image/video distress. This is called 'revenge porn', and it is against the law.
If this has happened to you, you can report it to the police.
Find out more about revenge porn here.
Is there a nude image of you online you want to remove?
The Think you Know website explains how to remove content from Facebook, Youtube, Instagram, Tumblr, Kik, Snapchat, Vine, Twitter and Askfm.
